A Faceful of Sizzla Jizzla

Despite a lack of MMA-related updates, the Jizzla follows MMA quite closely. Here are some matches that are upcoming, or are speculated. Regardless of their status, they have caught my attention.

Eric “Butterbean” Esch vs. Mariusz Pudzianowski

Look for “The Bean” to deliver a devastating haymaker early on. I see no other outcome. Will the Jizzla be proved wrong on 9-18-2010? Mock him here if he is!

Nick Diaz vs. KJ Noons

After losing their last meeting due to doctor stoppage, look for Diaz to grind Noons to a pulp. Diaz was never finished in their first fight, but cuts forced a stoppage. Diaz has since had surgery to remove the copious amounts of scar tissue on his face, lessening his chance of a repeat loss via doctor stoppage. Factor in the amount of anger Diaz must have regarding their first bout, and you have an awesome fight coming up in little more than a month.

Mark Hunt vs. Sean McCorkl

It’s going to be interesting to see Mark Hunt back in the ring….. er cage. While never a top level fighter, he is a massive man, able to deliver punishment as well as take it (getting KO’d by Melvin Manhoef’s cup notwithstanding).  Hopefully he’ll pull out a win and we get to see a reemergence of the former Pride fighter.

Frank Mir vs. “Cro Cop”

Cro Cop is in the final stages of his career and, despite a win over Patrick Barry, a man with dubious cardio, faces a stiff challenge in Frank Mir. Whether or not this is Cro Cop’s final hurrah, or the continuation of his accession up the HW ranks of the UFC remains to be seen.

Alistair Overeem vs. ???

Who will be Overeem’s next opponent? Once that was clear, now there are several possibilities on the horizon. That said, look for Overeem to concentrate on K-1 until 2011 rolls around, when a match with Fabricio Werdum seems to be in the stars.

The Jizzla is just testing to see how many spam post attempts I can get just by mentioning the UFC and UFC 109 multiple times, both in the post, title, and keywords/tags. UFC 109 is very UFC 109, more so than most people thought UFC 109 would be UFC 109. Watching UFC 109 should be like watching UFC 109, but watching UFC 109 will not be like watching a previous UFC, because UFC 109 is UFC 109. Did I mention UFC 109?

Spammers still suck teh cock and like buttsecks.

Have been getting well over 30 “comments” a day regarding how to watch UFC online for free. Thank heaven for spam control, but I still thought I’d take the opportunity to say that spammers suck teh cock.
That is all.
-Sizzla Jizzla

Yeah, it’s a follow up over a week after the event, but it’s still a follow up. Besides, it’s me, your humble Jizzla, so it’s always worthy the wait before I launch my Jizzness out to the world.

Fedor vs. Rogers – Once again, Fedor delivers in both excitement and “OMFG!!” factor. A punch that hearkens back to the days of his fights with Big Nog (Fight # 1 springs to mind), and delivering it in front of over 5 million viewers (and an unknown amount of people viewing online . Despite fighting another opponent that was much larger than him, Fedor showed why he is so dangerous, attempting multiple submissions even with a face full of blood from an opening round jab from Rogers that cut his nose. For Fedor, Overeem seems the next logical step, for Rogers, Bigfoot Silva would be an interesting match up to test where he can go from here.

Mousasi vs. Sokoudju – Another very exciting fight, with Sokoudju doing well until he gassed, suffering another defeat at the hands of Mousasi, but showing that he still has a lot to offer the MMA world as he gets ready to fight in Japan in December in the SuperHulk tournament final at Dream.

Shields vs. Miller – I was expecting more out of this fight, and although Shields did dominate, it was in, IMO, boring fashion. The most exciting part of this match was Miller’s RNC with the seconds ticking away. Had he secured it maybe 10 – 15 seconds earlier, it would have been lights out for Shields. That being said, Miller needs to work on his wrestling more, and Shields needs to work on defending the belt, as he has plenty of contenders willing to step up against him.

Bigfoot Silva vs. Werdum – A good match up that had me excited early. With Silva jumping on Werdum early, but Werdum, true to form, holding on and staging a comeback in the second round. Where each fighter goes from here remains to be seen. Werdum and the loser of Fedor/Overeem would be good, as would a match up with Rogers. Guess we’ll have to wait until Strikeforce lets us all know later on.

I didn’t get to watch the undercards, so I can’t comment, but I heard they weren’t all that bad. All in all though, I must say that this event was more exciting that the last few UFC’s put together. That being said, the UFC still has some exciting match ups down the pipe, I just wish that the fight card as a whole was better for each event. Hopefully competition from the likes of Strikeforce on free TV will get them to change. Only time will tell…

-Sizzla Jizzla

Another Strikeforce event makes it’s way to the public, less than a week away and on network television to boot. The card looks to entertain, with multiple matchups that your humble Jizzla is sincerely looking forward to. Before I get into the matchups I want to see, I have to point out that it’s cards like this that, on paper at least, are going to make Strikeforce an even more viable contender to the juggernaut that is the UFC. The fact that they have a friendly relationship with other organizations like Dream in Japan, speaks volumes about having their eyes on the big picture. Hopefully more fighters look at Strikeforce before deciding that they “have” to sign with the UFC to be successful. I like watching fights whenever and with whatever organization hosts them, but Strikeforce has been putting on IMO, more exciting shows lately, with nicer cards all around, not just one or two fights to look forward to. Not to say that the UFC is not exciting, but when you’re on top, you have less motivation to change. On to the matches…

Fedor Emelianenko vs. Brett Rogers – Obviously this is the big draw. A chance for fans to see Fedor fight again, which is always a treat, especially in the light of Affliction 3′s canceling and the organizations subsequent collapse. This is also a chance for Americans in general to see a him for first time, a great way to attract new fans, and for a price that is hard to beat. Although all signs point to Fedor turning in another dominant performance, one can’t discount the possibility of Rogers pulling an upset. He definitely has KO power, the question is, can his hands zero in on Fedor or will he, like so many others, fall to the fighting enigma that is Fedor? Either way, I don’t see this going more than one round.

Fedor by KO, Round 1

Jake Shields vs. Jason Miller – Another stellar fight on paper. I’ve watched both fighters and was very excited when I found out about this match. I think Jason Miller is more well rounded, with some great fights in Japan that stand out. Jake Shields brings a huge winning streak to this fight, and a good skill set that he used to accomplish it. That being said, I see Miller taking this one.

Jason Miller by KO, Round 2

Gegard Mousasi vs. Rameau Thierry Sokoudjou – After watching Mousasi dispatch “Babalu” in short order his last time out, I have no doubt that he’ll be an excellent matchup for the explosive Sokoudjou, who first made his name by quickly dispatching two Pride veterans before the organization was sold to the UFC. His UFC career might not have been great, but straddling both sides of the Pacific has proven well for him, as he is currently in the final of the Dream “Super Hulk” Tournament that concludes towards the end of the year, and fighting bouts with Strikeforce. Look for this one to end quickly, with just a question of who cracks who first. Though, if I have to pick one…

Gegard Mousasi by KO, Round 1

Antonio Silva vs. Fabricio Werdum – Another potential barn burner, this could end either way, multiple ways. I’m not even going to make a prediction on this one, rather I’m just going to sit back and enjoy.

? by ?, Round ?

Those are the fights I’m looking forward to the most, but I have a feeling the other fights are bound to delight. I would write more, but I’ll save that for after this epic event concludes. Epic? Yes, because by putting an event of this magnitude on free TV, Strikeforce has launched MMA into a whole new world. Sure Kimbo might have gotten some viewers, but by not banking on one match/person to hold this thing together, they have done themselves, and MMA in general, a huge favor.

-Sizzla Jizzlab

Well, your humble Jizzla watched UFC 104 with some friends while drinking beer (Beck’s Dark for those who care), and enjoying bratwurst cooked in beer.

Highlights – A genuinely exciting main event, with some decent undercard action.

Lowlights – Steve Mazzagatti as a referee (STILL!), and the bullshit decision of the year.

For now, the Jizzla will concentrate on the main points.

I enjoyed the fights up to the main event, though part of that was the presence of strong brew. However, despite the likely event that Cain Velasquez would have beaten Ben Rothwell eventually, Steve Mazzagatti appeared to stop the bout prematurely, depriving Cain of a highlight reel knockout, and just pissing off the audience in attendance, both in person and via PPV. Please fire this jagoff Dana White, you’ve criticized him before, why in the hell are you keeping this tool around?

The main event was the best UFC headliner in a while, spoiled by blind judges who ignored the stellar performance by Mauricio “Shogun” Rua, and gave a battered Lyoto Machida a slim unanimous decision. While I fault the judges the most, I have to add in the boxing style point system still used to judge fights that are far removed from boxing. Until this gets resolved, I doubt this will stop and leave many a deserving fighter missing a win, in addition to pissing off many a viewer.

-Sizzla Jizzla

Well, another month, and another UFC makes it’s way over to our eyeballs. Here’s to hoping this one won’t make me regret chipping in for the PPV/Pizza/Beer with friends. It’s still a fun time, but too many UFC’s are at least partially composed of fail, featuring lackluster undercards, and main events that make alcohol essential. Here’s what the Jizzla is looking forward to on the card:

Patrick Barry vs. Antoni Hardonk – Patrick Barry has the legs of an action figure. He first came to my attention in K-1, where he handed Gary Goodridge probably the most one-sided defeat of his K-1 career, cutting his face so bad the doctors stopped the fight about 2 seconds after they looked at the damage from 10 feet away. Now in MMA, Barry needs to stay calm and keep on his feet until his ground game improves. He has the potential to be very lethal to any opponent, but until he can survive on the ground, he’s stuck swimming in the middle of the talent pool.

Patrick Barry by KO, Round 1.

Ben Rothwell vs. Cain Velasquez - I’m just looking forward to a slugfest to get me geared up for the Main Event.

Cain Velasquez by KO, Round 1.

Lyoto Machida vs. Mauricio “Shogun” Rua – This is a tough one to call. It isn’t because of any lack of skill on either side, it’s because I have no idea which Shogun will show up. If an improved Shogun shows up, he could give Machida a run for his money, if the same Shogun that fought Mark Coleman shows up, then look for Machida to end it relatively quickly.

Split – Shogun by Split Decision OR Machida by KO, Round 2. Take your pick.

-Sizzla Jizzla

So Kimbo Slice lost to Roy Nelson via man tits + strikes yesterday. I was hoping for a decent fight, but aside from 45+ minutes of crappy commercials and unecessary bs, all I got to see was the equivalent of a non-title main event for a UFC PPV.

Simply terrible.

Honestly this is one of the worst seasons yet on a show I pay scant attention to, aside from watching the fights as time permits. At a friends house I had an opportunity to watch the show with commercials and, well intact, instead of a video of just the fight. I can safely say I haven’t missed a damn thing. I’m glad I gave up watching TV years ago.

Back to the fight, which, if you watched, consisted of Kimbo landing one or more decent shots, then getting taken down and smothered with Roy Nelson’s tits and belly while getting smacked in the face repeatedly. I honestly think Herb Dean stopped it out of embrassment.

Keep in mind that the UFC has stated, through the great bald(ing) one, Dana White, that Kimbo will fight regardless. In essence, they’re doing the same thing with Kimbo that Elite XC did. Very sad, though I guess it will be funny watching Kimbo get Kimbowned AGAIN!

This isn’t an MMA only blog, but MMA provides plenty of lulz for the Jizzla, so it gets mentioned a lot.

-Sizzla Jizzla

It’s 2009 and Kevin Ferguson aka: “Kimbo Slice”, star of  backyard brawls and a brief stint as an MMA fighter in the now defunct Elite XC, is back in the news. He’s one of several contestants in the UFC’s “Ultimate Fighter” contest, a reality show that rewards the proverbial last man standing with a chance to fight for the UFC.

The Jizzla thought he was more hype than anything else when he first entered MMA in 2007 and that’s still my feeling. Why is he still being taken seriously? Well for one, the UFC is the one promoting him. UFC President Dana White went from criticizing him to bringing him into the UFC fold via TUF in the last few months. This comes after he was defeated in a speedy 14 seconds by last minute replacement Seth Petruzelli in what was to be the final show for Elite XC.

Some view his defeat as proof that his prior matches were either works or, at best, “cans” to hype him up. Others view his loss as a stumbling block on the road to greater things. The UFC, with his TUF inclusion, and Dana White’s recent assertion that he will fight regardless of the show’s outcome, seems to believe the latter.

While certain to be a draw, Slice doesn’t have the skillset to compete at the higher levels of MMA, where striking isn’t everything, and weakness on the ground will be exploited sooner rather than later. Like Houston Alexander at 205, he lacks the ability to defend himself on the ground which, these days, is simply giving opponents “Carte blanche” to go for the takedown on the way to a GNP or submission victory. Size alone doesn’t a warrior make, and with the more complete skillset sported by his potential opponents in the UFC, it’s this reliance on the standup game that will guarantee a short stay once Slice reaches the deeper end of the HW division.

All being said, the Jizzla is looking forward to mass lulz once Slice starts competing again.  I can see the ani-gif’s and photoshops now.

-Sizzla Jizzla